Thursday, January 11, 2007

Slob bully fat bad hair

Don't cha just love it?

Two fully grown, successful, wealthy and powerful adults behaving like pre adolescent kids.

This is the stuff that (media) dreams are made of.

Now instead of getting you to weigh in on who you think is right/wrong, better/less better as this is pretty stupid to spend time on anyway, let's look at a more serious consequence.

You see, Rosie really does not stand a chance; at least that is what behavioral psychologists say.

Her main weapons are that she represent the underdog in this one, as Donald Trump is perceived as one of the most wealthy and powerful people in the world.

Rosie actually is no slob, at least in that department anyway, as she has complete and free access to TV and other media, and is not poor by any stretch of the imagination.

And she is fat.

Sorry, but that is the big bottomed line in human behavioral approach terms.

People cannot look at a fat person and feel the same respect they do for a thinner person, no matter how wonderful the fat person is.

Hey, gluttony is one of the 7 deadly sins, right?

Then again, so is greed but you can't really see greed.

You can see fat.

Just look to your left and look to your right.

If you were to honestly poll and I mean honestly, poll a million people who knew nothing about either of these people and said they were feuding, and ask them to pick a side, guess whose side they'd be on.

The Donald's of course, bad hair and all.

The fact that there is even a debate is a tribute to Trump's arrogance, brashness and clearly overpaid hairdresser.

Want more proof? Ok: you are now in a coliseum filled with people you don't know. Over the loudspeaker they announce your name and say that your fate will be determined by the crowd.

Which would you rather hear?

"Fat and Slob" or "bully and bad hair"?

Bully and bad hair never gave anyone cancer. Bully and bad hair never gave anyone diabetes.

Bully and bad hair never gave anyone heart disease or stroke or arthritis unless there is such a thing as arthritis of the scalp.

The study that said it all was the one that found that people would rather have sex with someone who had a sexually transmitted disease than a fat person.

Please don't kid yourself if you are fat. You are not bad. You are not evil. You are not worthless. You may not be a glutton.

You are very probably smart, driven, kind, sensitive and a very meaningful part of our society.

But as long as you are fat, very few people will see you that way.

When your name comes up, there will be the image of a fat person there if even for just an instant.

Psychologists talk about people who sabotage themselves.

What group of people do you think sabotage themselves the most often without meaning to?

If you said fat people, you are right.

If you are fat, get some help.

Get the body you want and the respect and love you deserve.

I can help:
Fabulous Fat Furnace - Ultra Strength Fat Furnace - protein powder

If you are really hurting and/or really serious, check out my Super Slim down Deal.

And never be cowed by bullies with bad hair again!

Doc

P.S. as you might have guessed, Lazlo had a crack at this feud with one of his limericks at the end of the page here.

Rosie vs. The Donald Limerick

Rosie and Donald sitting in a tree

F - e- u - d- i - n - g

First comes food, then comes swear

Then comes Donald kissing Miss America with HIS bad hair

It just goes to show

The worse kind of boast

When delivering a curse or a toast

The "F" bomb always damages the most

You can be a bully and get away with that

But no one can really love you as long as you're fat


Lazlo B Zilly 2007

Sunday, January 7, 2007

Diabesity

Boy do we love neologisms.

No, that is not something that happens in the bedroom - although it could!

It simply refers to the formation of new words.

Here are a couple of other personal favorites.

Benifer. Who could forget the torrid love affair between Ben what-was-his-name and Jennifer Aniston.

Now we have Brangelina.

If you ask me Brad Pitt got the short end of that deal. We can tell from the amount of letters in the name who wears the pants in that family!

Then there is Gen XXL, which describes the current propensity for large numbers of our under 21 crowd to be morbidly obese and energetic slugs.


Diabesity refers to my generation, however: the Baby Boomers.

We have (simply put) set new standards for getting fat, staying fat and getting all the diseases that go with it.

I have told you about cancer, diabetes, heart disease and stroke.

Some of you still haven't heard.

When I told you you could go numb below the waist, however, and become worthless in bed, then some of you perked up so to speak and listened.

I remind you that in a recent study, both men and women said they would rather have sex with someone who had a sexually transmitted disease than someone who was fat.

If that doesn't grab you nothing will.

If you are in the fat crowd pause and think about that when you lay down next to your spouse.

What’s that you say, he or she is fat too?

Oh that makes it all better.

Ok now that I have railed at you for your own good, here is something you might hear about soon.

When I was graduating Med School back around the time of Thomas Edison, a test known as the BMR or Basal Metabolic Rate was falling into disfavor.
We were told to forggedaboutit since it was worthless.

Well in one of those marvelous medical turnabouts that seems to happen every other day these days what is old is new again.

Of course we don't call it BMR because that would be admitting we were wrong 25 years ago.

Now it's called RMR for resting metabolic rate.

Some medical whiz kids have decided that gosh, your metabolic rate might be important and you might want to measure it so you could see if you need to do more to lose weight.

Here are a few tips for those whiz kids.

1) If you are over weight and not losing, you need to do more to lose weight.

You do not need a measurement to prove this.

2) Anyone who wants to lose weight would do well to increase their metabolic rates, decrease their appetites and up their energy to improve their exercise response.

To that end I have designed 2 supplements, Fabulous Fat Furnace and Ultra Strength Fat Furnace, a protein powder and a series of revitalizing exercises to help you in your quest for the best body.

It’s not rocket science but it has helped me and many others immensely!

Doc